I once had a morning routine that involved unplugging every appliance in my kitchen and checking twice—sometimes three times—that the iron was off.
Even on days I wasn’t ironing, I’d glance at the socket, my stomach doing a tiny flip of anxiety. It took me a while to realize this pattern went beyond mere caution.
If you find yourself constantly double-checking that the iron is off (or that the stove is off, or the door is locked), you might suspect it’s just a “bad habit.”
But from what I’ve observed in my own life and in conversations with friends, these seemingly minor obsessions often point to deeper fears.
Below are seven hidden fears that can fuel these meticulous check-and-recheck behaviors—and some insights into how you might begin to address them.
1. Fear of failure
For a long time, I resisted calling myself a “perfectionist,” because I didn’t think I was perfect at anything. But the fear of failure often lurks behind the compulsion to check that we’ve done everything correctly.
Maybe you worry a forgotten iron could burn down the house, and you’d be labeled as irresponsible.
The stakes might feel enormous: If you fail at this one little thing, it somehow confirms all your worst beliefs about yourself.
A friend once admitted she’d make herself late for work because she couldn’t walk away from her house without verifying every single switch was in the “off” position.
She was terrified of failing at being a “competent adult.”
If this resonates with you, one mindset shift is to experiment with “good enough.” For instance, if you’ve turned off the iron, allow yourself a single check.
After that, step away. Embracing “good enough” can be the first step toward less anxiety around the fear of failing at life’s small tasks.
2. Fear of responsibility
I used to think being responsible meant always doing the right thing—and never making mistakes.
When something as trivial as leaving an appliance plugged in began to symbolize a broader fear that I couldn’t handle adult life, I realized how much weight I was putting on seemingly small actions.
If you’re constantly double-checking the iron, you might be wrestling with the fear that you’re simply not prepared for the demands that come with real responsibility.
It’s almost as if you’re trying to prove to yourself, “Look, I’ve got this under control.”
But here’s a truth I’ve learned: True responsibility isn’t about flawless execution—it’s about being willing to learn and adapt.
Accepting that mistakes or oversights can happen (and that you’d handle them if they did) can chip away at the “must double-check” mentality.
By recognizing you’re capable of addressing problems if they arise, you start trusting your ability to manage life’s curveballs.
3. Fear of uncertainty
I’m no stranger to the discomfort of “not knowing” how something might turn out.
There was a time I’d triple-check whether my car was locked, as if ensuring certainty in one tiny aspect of life would shield me from the bigger unpredictabilities. Let’s face it: Life is full of ambiguity.
We never truly know how every situation will unfold.
In my own journey, I stumbled upon Rudá Iandê’s Free Your Mind masterclass at a point when my anxieties around all sorts of “what if” questions were hitting a peak.
While I won’t go into the detailed exercises here, I can say that Rudá’s teachings made me aware of how many limiting beliefs I was holding onto—especially around uncertainty.
He helped me see that my fixation on checking tiny details was tied to a deeper desire to control everything around me.
Gradually, I began letting go of that need for absolute certainty, focusing instead on building trust in my ability to cope with life’s unpredictability.
If you find yourself stuck in a loop of double-checking, I highly recommend giving his course a try. It might open your eyes to how your deeper fears feed into everyday habits.
4. Fear of being judged
I grew up in a tight-knit environment, and that sometimes meant the smallest mishaps got a lot of attention.
Over time, I developed a hyper-awareness of what people might think of me. If the iron was left on and it caused an issue, would I be seen as reckless? Would I be judged for not “taking enough care”?
This fear of judgment can grow insidious. It’s not just about the actual danger of something like a fire—it’s about the possibility of social repercussions.
What will people say? Will they ridicule you behind your back?
To counter this, I’ve tried to remember that human beings are usually more forgiving and less observant of our little slip-ups than we fear. People are often too preoccupied with their own lives to focus on our minor mistakes.
Reminding myself of that reality made it easier to silence the voice in my head that insisted I’d be harshly judged for any oversight.
5. Fear of regret
I had a roommate once who checked everything—windows, doors, oven knobs—right before bed. She’d say, “I just can’t live with the regret if something happened.”
She wasn’t worried about being caught or judged; she was worried about the self-punishment she’d endure if an accident did occur.
If you’re the type who replays scenarios over and over in your mind, regret might be a driving force. You imagine the worst-case outcome, then think, “If only I’d checked one more time…” and you can’t bear the idea of living with that guilt.
Handling this fear often involves developing a healthier relationship with the concept of risk. Nothing in life is zero-risk—your mind might try to promise that triple-checking everything will prevent regret, but it’s a temporary fix.
A more lasting approach is to practice some self-compassion: remind yourself that accidents or slip-ups can happen, and it doesn’t mean you have to hate yourself if they do.
6. Fear of losing control
I used to think I had everything under control—until I realized how stressed I got whenever things didn’t go my way.
Double-checking the iron can be a symbol of trying to control all possible outcomes. If I make sure every knob is off, I’ve minimized the likelihood of chaos.
The irony, of course, is that life is inherently chaotic. No amount of checking will entirely eliminate the unexpected. Recognizing this fact can be both terrifying and liberating.
On the one hand, it forces us to accept vulnerability; on the other, it frees us from the endless burden of trying to micromanage every detail.
A valuable practice I’ve experimented with is intentionally allowing small uncertainties in safe environments. For example, leaving the house without verifying for the third time that a window is locked (even though you checked it twice).
It might feel uncomfortable at first, but gently leaning into that discomfort builds resilience—showing your mind that you can handle the tension of not being entirely in control.
7. Fear of not being enough
In my earlier career, I gave community workshops on stress management. A recurring theme that came up was this deeply rooted fear of “not being good enough.”
People would share how they would obsess over minor details—like re-checking an iron—because any tiny mistake felt like proof of their inadequacy.
It’s easy to slip into a mental cycle of thinking a small oversight is a grand reflection of your worth.
If you burn a shirt (or worse, start a fire), it might confirm a narrative you secretly believe: “I’m careless,” “I’m incompetent,” or “I’m a failure.”
Bringing awareness to these self-defeating stories is a game-changer. One approach I recommend is simple journaling: each time you catch yourself on the brink of double-checking, jot down what you’re afraid might happen—and what that outcome would mean to you.
Chances are, you’ll notice a pattern relating to self-worth. Understanding that you’re battling an internal belief about “not being enough” can help you gradually break the cycle.
Conclusion
The habit of double-checking the iron isn’t just about safety—often, it’s an outward expression of deeper concerns we carry inside. Whether it’s fear of failure or regret, these anxieties can shape our everyday routines more than we realize.
I’m a huge advocate of self-awareness, and part of that involves recognizing the motivations behind our seemingly small habits.
While these fears might feel overwhelming, confronting them can spark real change. From learning to handle uncertainty to embracing the idea that “good enough” really can be enough, every small step you take helps dismantle the cycle of obsessive checking.
Trust that you can walk out the door once, without returning for multiple glances. You’re capable, resilient, and more prepared than you might think.
That’s something I’ve discovered in my own life—and a truth I continue to hold close in moments of lingering doubt.
