I lived in Paris for a few months as a digital nomad back in the day, early in my career. Every morning, I’d walk along cobblestone streets, grab a fresh baguette on my way home, and wonder what it would be like to truly belong in the City of Light. Paris is dreamy, romantic, and enchanting—no doubt about that. But beneath the postcard-perfect facade is a set of cultural norms that locals follow religiously.
Tourists—blissfully unaware or sometimes just choosing to ignore these unwritten rules—often rub Parisians the wrong way. You might think, “I’m just here to enjoy the Louvre and eat croissants; what’s the big deal?” But if you really want to blend in (or at least avoid dirty looks), you need to know what truly bugs the locals.
Below are 10 unspoken rules in Paris that many tourists break every single day, and why it drives locals up the wall.
1. Failing to Greet Shopkeepers Properly
The moment you enter a boutique or a bakery, you must say “Bonjour” (and a polite “Bonsoir” if it’s after around 6 PM). If you’re feeling extra fancy, say “Bonjour madame/monsieur.” It’s not just a sweet gesture—it’s a sign of respect and acknowledgment.
Why locals hate it: In many cultures, you can stroll into a store without uttering a word. In Paris, you’re basically ignoring the shopkeeper as a person if you don’t say hello. Not greeting them is considered extremely rude and sets the stage for a cold, awkward interaction.
Tip: Practice your best “Bonjour” before you hop off the plane. It’s one of the easiest ways to earn a little Parisian goodwill.
2. Speaking Loudly in Public
Americans (and I say this as someone who’s spent significant time around them) are notorious for having “big” voices in Europe, but they’re not the only ones. Many tourists, carried away by excitement, end up talking or laughing a bit too boisterously on the metro or in cafes.
Why locals hate it: The French value privacy and subtlety in public spaces. Parisians, especially, keep conversations relatively discreet. Loud voices cut through the subtle hum of the city and can come across as intrusive.
Tip: Keep the volume to a calm, indoor level. Save the enthusiastic stories for the privacy of your apartment or hotel room.
3. Not Attempting Any French at All
Parisians are protective of their language. While many of them speak English (often very well), they’d prefer if you at least try to say a few words in French—beyond “Bonjour” and “Merci.” Even an attempt to pronounce the menu items will earn you a nod of approval.
Why locals hate it: If you show zero interest in the language, it feels like you’re not even making an effort to understand where you are. It reeks of a “the world should speak my language” attitude, which won’t get you far with the French.
Tip: Learn simple phrases like “Excusez-moi,” “S’il vous plaît,” and “Où sont les toilettes?” My personal favorite line: “Pardon, mon français n’est pas très bon, mais je fais de mon mieux.” (Translation: “Sorry, my French is not very good, but I’m doing my best.”)
4. Touching the Produce at Markets Without Permission
Fresh produce markets in Paris are a feast for the eyes. But the big mistake many tourists make is grabbing that shiny tomato or feeling the ripeness of that avocado without permission.
Why locals hate it: Market vendors often want to select the produce for you. They pride themselves on offering the best quality. When you start fumbling with the fruit, you could bruise it or mishandle it, and that’s a major faux pas.
Tip: Wait patiently and politely ask for the item you want. Or point if your French is shaky. The vendor will typically pick the fruit or vegetable for you with care.
5. Not Observing Meal Etiquette
When you’re in a restaurant, especially a nicer one, avoid plopping your elbows on the table or diving straight into your bread basket. Parisians have a bit of a ritual about dining—starting with an apéritif, moving slowly to the main course, then dessert and coffee.
Why locals hate it: The French take dining seriously; it’s not just about feeding yourself but experiencing the art of conversation and savoring the meal. If you treat it like a pit stop, you’ll come off as disrespectful to the tradition.
Tip: Try to relax and go with the flow. Don’t rush your order, and if bread is on the table, tear off small pieces rather than biting directly into the loaf. Bonus points if you compliment the chef or the server about how much you enjoyed your meal.
6. Expecting 24/7 Convenience
Sure, New York might be the city that never sleeps, but Paris definitely takes its beauty rest. On Sundays, many shops (including supermarkets) shut down or operate on very limited hours. Parisians love their days off, and the city respects that.
Why locals hate it: Tourists who complain about shops being closed on Sundays or at lunch break are missing the point. The French work to live, not live to work, and that means focusing on rest, family, and a slower pace on certain days.
Tip: Plan ahead. Stock up on essentials before Sunday, and don’t be that person banging on the shutter of a closed store at 1 PM.
7. Blocking the Sidewalk or Metro Entrances
Paris can be crowded, especially during rush hour. Tourists who pause in the middle of a bustling sidewalk to snap selfies or check Google Maps create human traffic jams that test a Parisian’s patience.
Why locals hate it: Parisians walk with a purpose—trying to get from point A to point B efficiently. Suddenly stopping in the flow of foot traffic is basically a cardinal sin.
Tip: If you need to consult your phone or take a quick photo, step to the side. Be aware of people around you. This small courtesy keeps things moving smoothly (and keeps you in locals’ good graces).
8. Expecting ‘Customer Is King’ Treatment
In many parts of the world, the customer is always right. In Paris, not so much. There’s a sense of mutual respect rather than the idea that the customer is automatically superior.
Why locals hate it: Some tourists walk into establishments expecting the staff to bend over backwards. That’s just not the culture here. Service can be more formal, sometimes even distant. This doesn’t mean it’s rude—it’s just the French way.
Tip: Don’t bark orders or demand special treatment. Instead, approach interactions as an equal. Politeness, patience, and a little humility go a long way.
9. Wearing Athletic Clothes Everywhere
Yes, we live in an age of athleisure where leggings and hoodies are common, but in Paris, style still reigns supreme. This doesn’t mean you have to be runway-ready, but dressing like you’ve just rolled out of the gym can raise eyebrows.
Why locals hate it: Fashion is deeply ingrained in French culture. While modern Parisians aren’t all strutting around in Chanel, they tend to put thought into their outfits. Seeing people wander around in baggy sweatpants can come off as lazy or disrespectful to the city’s fashion heritage.
Tip: You don’t need to go full haute couture. Just keep it neat, comfortable, and slightly more put-together than you might in your hometown. A simple, clean outfit will do wonders for how locals perceive you.
10. Complaining About Small Portions and Slow Service
Paris isn’t known for monstrous serving sizes or speedy service. But what they do provide is carefully curated dishes meant to be savored. Patience is key in any French dining experience.
Why locals hate it: To complain about the portions is to miss the point of quality over quantity. As for service—locals enjoy taking their time at the table. Constantly waving at the waiter or huffing about the wait seems pushy and ill-mannered.
Tip: Embrace the slower pace and smaller portions. Savor each bite and allow the meal to unfold naturally.
How to Win the Hearts of Parisians (or at Least Not Offend Them)
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Politeness is everything. Greet people properly, say “please” and “thank you,” and smile (but don’t overdo it—overly enthusiastic greetings can be off-putting).
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Observe and adapt. Before you do something (like handling produce), watch how the locals do it. Then follow their lead.
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Appreciate the culture. Try a few French phrases, learn a bit about French history or current affairs, and show genuine interest.
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Take it slow. Whether it’s dining or strolling through a museum, don’t rush. The French pride themselves on enjoying life’s pleasures at a steady pace.
Paris can sometimes feel intimidating, especially when you’re worried about committing a faux pas. But at the end of the day, Parisians just want you to respect their culture. If you follow these unspoken rules (or at least try your best), you’ll not only avoid eye-rolls and passive-aggressive sighs, but you might just earn a few smiles along the way.
I remember my first day in Paris vividly—standing in line at a boulangerie, petrified to order because my French was terrible. I stumbled through “Une baguette, s’il vous plaît,” with a thick accent. The baker gave me a half-amused, half-encouraging grin. From that moment on, I knew that trying—and showing respect to the local culture—was half the battle.
So, next time you’re in the City of Light, remember these unspoken rules. Embrace the local customs, and you’ll find that Paris welcomes you with open arms (and perhaps an extra buttery croissant). After all, it’s not just about the Eiffel Tower and the fancy pastries—it’s about immersing yourself in one of the world’s most enchanting cultures.
